Almost The End

Hello everyone,  

   For a while, I was encouraged by some of my Blog Readers, to turn my Blog in to A Book!                    "It  seems  that you had a very Interesting Life Shira! You should write a book about it!" I was               told, by  my friends and the few relative who are still around... "What do you mean by 'Had'?I still      Do!" Came my answer... Unlike most people in my Age group (83); I have been very lucky, to be in      good health, thanks to the medicine I have been taking... However, lately I noticed that my 'Sense            of Humor' is not as sharp as it used to be; and was encouraged by my doctor to  be checked for the  possibility of Dementia, or Alzheimer (God Forbid...)  Unlike most people my age group, my memory      is still very strong! However, after resisting my doctor advised to be checked for a Memory lose, I finally agreed... "Do you know what is the best thing about Memory Loss? X I was telling  everyone who wanted to hear:x "We  forget that we are losing it!"

  I was a bit surprised, when my doctor left a message on the phone, asking for 'Rabbi Karen Deitsch'    (my daughter) to call himת  in order to discuss my Test Results...Why would he want to talk to her instead  of m e?" I wondered... Karen, who called me after their conversation, sounded very calm, (a bit x to calm)  I also took another test, which Thank God lasted one hour only... My husband's cousin Marcia, who has always been "My Best Friend", came from Florida X. in order to be with me. "You seem to be much more Nervous then I am, Marcia!" I told her...  It seemed "Fearless Shira" was about to face one of the biggest Health Challenges of  her life; but I was not afraid: My 'Inner Optimist', was telling me not to worry and promised I would come through this ordeal with '"Flying colors!"  

   I have written before about my parents, who were among the 'Early Poisoners', who established the          first 'Vegetarian Village' in Israel and together with their neighbors, refused to use Fertilizers, which acording to them, would poison the fruit and vegetables!:"People should Never Eat Meat!"X My brother and I were told repeatedly, by our Veterinarian parents: "Just think of the Terrible Pain, which these poor animals experience, as they are being slotred!..."  I could understand why people may kill Snakes and  other kind of dangerous creatures, but what did the poor cows, lambs, chickens, turkeys and rabbits do    to us, in order to deserve such a horoble ending?!   

  I remembered how several parents from my school, came to our house, complaining that X"Because of your daughter, our kids are refusing to eat meat!" These visits, gave my parents a 'Great Opportunity to  try and 'Convert' more people to Vegetarianism and stop eating meat! Besides their Vegetarianism, my parents practiced Meditation and Yoga, which they learned from books,way before Yoga became popular in the Western World... There was a big library, in our small house; most of the books were about Health and natural Proper Eating: "How to avoid Toxic Food, You are what you eat! Say No, to the Western Medicine!" As well as several others about vegetarianism and health...There were several books for me and children for me and Romi,who was five years older then me. At one point he began to rebel against our parents' Vegiterian Way of Life ' and many years later, after my parents were gone , he told me that "XYou may take all these stupid books! I don't want them, I Love eating meat!"  I was happy to take the books since after all, Reading any  kind of a books, was always one of my Greatest Passions...                                                                                                                          

   Al and I, created several groups of new friends in L.A, inviteing them to our home, in order to celebrate Holidays, Birthdays and other events... Other gusts and family members, arrived from New Jersey, where Al grew up, as well as Washington D.C, Israel, Italy and France...Those wonderful visits would come to an end, when the Corona Virus arrived... The death toll was rising dayly as people stayed at home, afraid to go out...We were all 'Glued' to the T.V screen, watching with horror how the Death Toll from the Corona Virus was rising... It was a dark time; socializing came to a complete X hult, as  people stopped inviting family members and friends to their home for dinner parties or barbecues. They also stopped going to the Theater, Concerts any kind of gathering... Everyone was horrified by this new disease, which was spreading like a wild fire around the world!    

  Besides the Pandemic, other disasters were taking place around the Globe...On the T.V screen we      were able to see "Civil Unrest, Political Corruption, Elections Fraud and a Ban on legal abortions", as    well as a bitter long war, between Russia and the Ukraine, which was 'Giving birth' to fear and rumors about an up coming Third World War...On the Television sets, we could see devastating  how Wild Fires were consuming forests and houses, Torrential Rains, Floods and Starving Refuges, with sick children  and old parents; who were able to escape the wars in their countries and come to the United States, with hope for a better life and insread,  witneswsed how see their dreams crushed and were sent back, with  their crying babies, to the country from which they fled...     

  Several years after the Corona Pandemic came under control, I was finally able to deal with my deep  pain, over the devastating loss of Al, my beloved husband and best friend over fifty years...I was working as a psychologist; specializing in Clinical Hypnotherapy and Voice Dialog. At one point my clients said  to me: x"You must be very tired Dr Shira, maybe you should rest a bit and Meditate, as you always tell   us to do! It really helps, you know!" Years later, after I was diagnosed by my doctors as having "The beginning of Dementia"; my friends and clients became very concerned:"Did you forget that I am Free    of Fear'?" I reminded them, trying to calm everyone down... I have to admit that in spite of my Bravery and Optimism, I was finding myself, going through a few 'Dark moments of my own'... I told myself that  I could not afford to indulge in my own pain; after all I had an obligation to my clients and should stop paying so much attention to my own worries...   

   I can't remember when and where I was, the first time I noticed, that"My Amazing Memory" which        I was always so proud of; was beginning to fade... I was always looking for an Alternative new Healing Methods, besides Traditional Psychology and Hypnotherapy, which I have been using so far at my work    I began to recommend Proper Nutrition, Meditation, Acupuncture and other 'Natural tools', besides the Conventional Medicine and was always looking for the latest Information about"Dementia"... I never stopped looking for new ways of healing, for my clients, friends, family members and now for myself

  I would like to invite you my dear readers, to visualize yourselves lifting up your wine glass and sing with me the familiar song, from the Musical"Fiddler On The Roof":X "Let's drink to Life Lechaim; Lechaim, Lechaim to Life!"x...Then, hold up the wine glass and add:"To Life in the Fifth Dimension!"X Below, are several photos of my Grand daughter Eliya, who is a 'Dog lover'; holding, hugging and kissing the few dogs which belong to our small family in L.A and declaring, that when she grows up, she is going to become a Veterinarian! 

Savta Shira with Eliyah	Eliyah and Koah	Eliyah with Moses	Eliyah and Bear

With Love and Light,
Shira

  Name

Essie (Ace)

    Several weeks after my birthday celebration, my granddaughter Eliya asked me to take her for a swim at our pool...After Al's passing, Karen asked Essie (his devoted care taker) if he would stay: x"In order to keep my mother compony, so she shouldn't be all by herself, in such a big house!" Essie who by now all our family members, agreed and was embraced by us as if he always was a part it... This time however, Essie was not at home and in spit of Ellie's protests, I insisted we go swimming only after he comes back, since we should have  someone near by, when we are in the pool! At one point, after Essie's returned, Ellie and I spent enough time in the water and decided to get out. Essie was carrying  Eliya, whom he wrapped in a big towel and I followed them and was trying to wipe off, the water which was dripping from my hands and legs, when I suddenly slipped and fell down... I have never broken any limb before, but the sharp pain in my left leg, told me it was broken... I called for Essie, who came back running,with Eliya in his arms, and instructed him to phone Karen and Greg, as well as calling for an Ambulance! My pain was telling  me, that it was not just a 'Simple Fall'... After my arrival to the hospital and having my leg 'Exrayed'x I was told that my Left leg was broken in two places! This "Event" took place on the December Seventh; the same day when the horrifying Murder (Rather 'Slaughter') of a group of sleeping young Israelis,who just celebrated an evening of singing and dancing, on their summer vacation...

   When I finally came back home from the hospital, my Granddaughter Eliyah, who was sitting on the sofa began to cry, when she saw the cast on my leg... In spite of the pain,I was doing my best to comfort her: "It will be all right Sweetheart, don't be so scared, I slipped and hurt my leg, not such a big deal! Didn't you ever fall and hurt yourself?" I told her as calmly as I could."But you said that your leg is broken!" Eliyah answered in a trembling X voice,"Don't worry my baby, even if it is broken, the doctor would fix it!" I said. The ambulance took me to the 'Argent Care Clinic'. The 'Ex Rays' showed that my ankle was broken in two places... I was fitted with a 'Temporary Cast' and was allowed to go home and make sure to stay in bed, for the following two weeks, before going back to the hospital, in order to find  out, if the 'Broken Bone' was mending.X"In the case it is not mending as it should be, you will have to    go back to the hospital for surgery!" I was told...

   After returning home I was sleeping most of the time, thanks to the powerful 'Pain Killer Medicine'    which the doctors prescribed... Being an active person, made it challenging, as well ad frustrating, to be restricted to Bed! My friend Helen said that Humanity is about to move, from the 'Third Dimension' which is our present home, to the '5th Dimension'; our Spiritual one..."Your job Shira is to write a book, which would prepare people, for this Highly Important up coming event!" Ellen told me.  Until the accident I   did not find the time to write, since I was always busy; teaching, seeing clients and working on my P.H.D. dissertation...  It almost seemed as if the only way to make me sit and write my book; was to "Break a leg" in order to 'Put me down' and load me with  the 'Spiritual Information', regarding all the "up coming Big Changes", which Humanity is about to go through

   In spite of my optimism and sense of humor, I was having doubts, regarding the 'New Job' I was given of "Preparing people for the Up Coming Journey to the 5th Dimension". In the meantime I was restricted  to Bed' and was experiencing a new and unfamiliar emotion, of feeling sorry for myself. I read a lot, was writing in my blog, watched Television and welcomed my friends and the few family members, who came for a visit... My Playful Inner Child was handing my visitors Crayons and Markers, inviting them  to go  ahead and decorate my cast; a request which they enthusiastically ,fulfilled... It was amusing to watch the joy and 'Childish Excitement', on the face of my 'Grown Up' friends, whose 'Playful Inner kids', were set  free... It seemed as if an invisible door opened up, so they could go back in time, to the care free days of childhood, when there was nothing more exciting, then drawing on the Cast of your friend's broken leg

   Two weeks later, the doctor called to inform me that the Bone, was not mending as it should... A surgery would be necessary after all and I will have to go back to Cedars Sinai Hospital... While in the hospital, I befriended a few of the medical staff members and was sharing with them the information about "Oneness Consciousness and Unconditional Love" My new friends were nodding their heads hesitantly, probably wondering, why I was not 'Locked Up' in the  Psychiatric Word... I found a 'Handful of People' (most of them from  the Cleaning Crew) who were fascinated by my theories of the 'After Life' and asked for  my phone number, so they could come for Hypnosis Sessions, after I leave the hospital.  Back home I was lying in bed, using Al's old wheel chair, to move around and feeling   sorry for myself; an emotion which was foreign to me... Even though I was always an  Avid Reader          I found myself unable to concentrate on a book and was constantly trying to find the 'Right Position'      for    my Broken Leg in the heavy cast...  I was restless and irritable, which was not at all like me and   was spending most of my time in bed; reading, writing, watching television and trying to overcome     my  cfeelings of loneliness  and impatience...  

   On the morning of October 8th, I woke up early, feeling sorry for myself and was turning around in bed, trying to find a more comfortable position for my broken leg   I turned on the television, which during these long weeks of isolation, became my only 'Life Line', to the outside world and was alarmed and shocked, to learn about  the Massacre, which took place at the 'Nova Festival' in Israel, where men, women and children, were brutally attacked, raped and taken hostage to the Tunnels in Gaza  I was calling my family members and friends in Israel to find out how they were doing, realizing that they seemed to be in a state of shock! As the days passed on, more terrifying news began to arrive, describing the Brutality and Torture which the kidnapped Israelis were experiencing, at the hands of the "Hamas Terror Organization"... During the first three months after my surgery, I was in bed with my cell phone next to me and was watching with concern the American and Israeli News chanals on the T.V... In spite   of my usual optimism, I was experiencing moments of deep Sadness and unfamiliar loneliness and was  trying my best, not to sink into Melancholy and Self Pity, which I saw some of my clients, friends and family members, go through from time to time

   Many years ago, my mother told me that "Turning Old is not a Picnic!" When Karen was three years        old, Al and I used to visit his older relatives, who moved to Miami after retirement, in order to escape the cold and freezing winters of New Jersey... I was deeply touched, by the joy and excitement, which these old relatives welcomed us with and the Love they showered on our baby Karen... Their loneliness and longing for their own grandchildren, who lived so far away broke my heart and I was wondering  if Al  and I, would also be going through the same feelings of loneliness, when we become their age... In order to shake away these gloomy thoughts, I was using the two magical wards which I have been using with my clients, as they were under Hypnosis:"Delete Delete!". However, lying alone in bed and looking at the cast on my broken leg, did not encourage my 'Positive Thinker' to show up... What did help, was spending time with my tiny family: Al, Karen, Greg and my Granddaughter Eliyah and catch up with some of the  'New Friends we made....    

   Several mouths would pass before the war in Israel, which was raging for months, will come to an end The Hostages were held in the underground tuneless of Gaza and Israel, seemed to be torn apart politically Many in the south of the country, were killed or wounded, before being evacuated to the center of Israel   It was as if the whole world has been going Mad and the peaceful old way of life, which we experienced  will never come back...The few friends in my age group were having all kinds of Health Issues  like Los Memory ... Our familiar way of life, seemed to have changed forever! Waves of Antisemitism, began to spread  the U.S, Europe and other parts of the world... Violent Demonstrations as well as deep Political Disagreements, were now taking place on a daily basis... On the T.V screen, we could see the violence  and chaos at the High schools and Universities. Dark rumors about an up coming Third World War, were spreading like black clouds, pushed forward by winds of Hatred... I kept on reminding myself that things are not always bad and life seems to go on after all: Kids are busy with their games and the Spring is on it's way, ready to paint over the 'Grayness of winter' beautiful new colors ... Like the rest of the Israelis, I was unable to stop watching the new about the fate of the captured Israeli soldiers, who were kidnapped and taken to Gaza and was trying to keep in touc, with family members and the few close friends I still have in Israel; my beloved, vulnerable small country of birth... 

   Even though I am not Religious, I often closed my eyes and pray for Peace, remindin myself that Hope is stronger then Fear, Laughter wipes away Tears, Joy is greater then Sadness and Love would always  overcomes Hatered...The recovery of my broken leg was taking a long time...  When we celebrated my    granddaughter's  seventh birthday, she said to me: "You know Savta, sixth years old is still young, but Seven... "Wait until you turn Eighty One, like me" I pointed at myself and she burst in to a loud laughter 

Celebration XX V, Photos Moved add a photo of me at eighty.(Al's age) . Mirror.

   Al and I bought our first home, about a year after moving to California... It was a two-story red          brick house, located in Studio City; with a small pool and room for a garden, where our three years        old daughter Karen, 'Helped Us' plant some flowers and carrots...We added a "Swing Set", a small 'Play House' and were ready to 'Finally Settle Down'... Both Al and I were 'Very Social'... We enjoined having guests and entertaining the new friends we made in L.A; as well as the visitors, who flew in from N.Y  Jersey,Washington D.C, Puerto Rico, Italy and guests from Israel...We were able 'to convince, a handful   of family members from the East Coast; to join us as 'Permanent Residents' in Sunny California! Al's younger brother Steve, who just graduated from Law school and cousin Marcia, who was two years younger then me and became my beloved 'Cousin in Law'; as well as a 'Soul sister and my Best Friend'!    I was delighted to be a part of this Warm and Loving family, with whom we would celebrate our Holidays Birthdays and weddings; as well as Anniversary and 'Be there for one another', in difficult and painful times;  'Life' may put on our way' from time to time...

   The years were 'passing by' fast...before realizing it, our 'Little Karen', who lived for a while in New Zealand, Australia and in Israel; moved back to the U.S. to begin her studies at' Hebrew Union Collage'  Al and I never imagined, that Karen, our 'One and only child'; would become an Ordained Rabbi... We found ourselves going through the "Empty Nest Syndrome" and decided, it may be time for us to make     a change as well and begin to look for the right house and eventually found one... It was partially built which would enable us to have our own input, during the process of completing it!  The fact we were   very busy with this new project, left us with little time, to worry about our ''Nomadic' Only Child, who was "Still Running all over the world!"; just like the two of us did, alone, by ourselves and later together so many years before...

   Our first house in Studio City, was located at the bottom of a tall mountain (No view). The new one       in Sherman Oaks, was built on Top of the tallest mountain in the neighborhood and had 'a Breath Taking' view from three sides... There was enough space for a garden, several fruit trees and a small swimming pool at the Backyard'. There was room for a Swing Set and a small Play House, for our future Grandchild Eliyah, who would arrive several years later, after Karen received her credentials as a 'Rabbi' and settled down in Studio City, one street away from her childhood home...  Years later, it would be the very same neighborhood, where she would be living with Greg and our 'One and only'beloved Grand daughter Eliyah'...

                       Our newly built home, pool, garden and ' Karen's Playhouse' in Sherman Oak

  Al and I lived in our new home, for many blissful years... It was a good life! Just as in our previous      home, this one was also full with friends and visitors; who came from 'all over the world'! (Well maybe  some of it... Years later after Al's passing at the age of Eighty three, it was good to have Karen and her  tiny family of three, live near by... It would help me to deal better, with the loneliness I was dealing    with    after my beloved husband's Al's departure... At one point, as my 80th birthday was approaching      I was asked by Karen, to give some thoughts and ideas, to the place I would like to celebrate it... After considering several options, Karen and I decided that rather then having the party in a restaurant, we should celebrate at our Sherman Oaks home; the place we created together and enjoyed so much!

    Women only were invited...Among them several of Karen's school friends, who used to be frequent       visitors at our Studio City home... Since we had only one child, Al and I were always delighted to have   Karen's friends at our home! Her friends knew that besides being a Psychologist, I was also a  'Clinical Hypnotherapist'; a fact which fascinated them...They often shared their problems with me and I loved      to work with them (Free of charge!) which I did, after receiving their parents consent... In the following years, these former Teens got married, had kids and delighted me with an occasional visit ...Through out    the years, after Al's passing; Karen Xwould invite these friends, to celebrate my birthday at our home together with a few of 'Albie' and a few of our friends:X"XThose who are still Ticking!" As Al used to    say... After considering several options for the party, we decided 'To Host' a "Five O'clock Tea"; like      the one I was introduced to, in my youth, during my first trip to England...

. Shira on Mother's day	Marcia and Shira playing "Twins"	With Karen on Shira's 80's birthday	With Etel

    Al's cousin Marcia was a year younger then me...We always felt more like Sisters, then "Cousins          in Law"... The two of us had a lot in common: We were both teachers who loved to laugh ,were Avid Readers', enjoyed Intellectual Discussions', Classical Music , Museums,Theater, Movies and shared          a similar playful ('A bit childish') Sense of Humor... After settling in California, Al and I convinced his Cousin Marcia, to move from Florida to LA, where she became a 'Loving Aunt', to our four years old Karen and was our closest Family Member! We celebrated together all the holidays and Birthday parties We were delighted, to have a family members living near us, beside the friends we made in Los Angeles we were able to "Import" Al's younger brother Steve (who just graduated from Law school) and several years later, Nephew Glen Deitsch from new Jersey, who was happy to settle in Sunny California... We  finally had a 'Small Family', to share with us Holidays, Anniversaries and other happy events...Years    later, Cousin Marcia's small family of three, left us to settle in Miami. so she could take care of her    aging parents...We kept in touch by phone, emails and visits back and fourth, but sadly, it was not the same as having them close by... 

    Years later, I called Marcia to ask if she could "Please come and help me, with the celebration of       my  80's birthday"... Her answer was very short:"Love To!  Marcia was able to find in L.A, a restaurant which was serving (and delivering) Authentic English "High Tea"... Besides Tea, the menu offered small cakes named "Scones and Crumpets" which we jokingly named; "Stones and Trumpets"...There was a variety of ' Open Face sandwiches'; as well as cookies and cakes... For this Special Occasion I used the 'Fine China', Al and I received as our Wedding Gifts, which amazingly, survived our six moves: Puerto Rico, Atlanta, Augusta, Miami and Los Angeles, which would be our final destination...

   This party gave me the opportunity, to invite 'Who ever was left', from our old friends...As well as           a few previous clients, I befriended through out the yeas, in spite of the fact, that "Psychologists are       not supposed to befriend their Clients!"..."Other guests were a few of Karen's friends; among them        her best friend Alison, from the Third Grade; whom I nicknamed "My second daughter!" The "High    Tea", was delivered to our house, which was decorated with colorful flowers from our garden...

   I  also arranged for a Workshop about the "Power of Positive Thinking" which was given by my          friend Dr Ethel...; Marcia ordered colorful hats, decorated with paper flowers,which the guests tried        on and exchanged between them; "In order to match the colors of our outfits! The hats made the house look like a lovely "Garden of Women"... It was the first party I hosted without Al, my  beloved husband and best friend... I couldn't help feeling sad and was wishing he was there with us, in Spirit... My pain lifted as I looked through the window at my granddaughter Eliyah and Lisa, her best friend; shrieking  with Joy as they were running in the garden, chasing butterflies; with 'Moses' barking close behind...     For some reason, this memory is my Sweetest Memory from that day... I have to admit that after the guests left; I began to feel lonely and a bit sad... It was not easy admitting (even to myself...) that I am 'Getting Old'... "I can not believe I am Eighty! When I look at the mirror I don't look a day older then sixty!' (I was telling my image in the Mirror) "Maybe even younger! What do you think?  But I receive   no answer; I wounder why?...

 

 

                                                                           THE  END